Match Made in Holland

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By Justin Park

She talked to me in Korean, even though I answered in English. It had been a long time since I spoke Korean to anyone besides my parents and other first-generation relatives. But within a couple of days, I found myself talking to her in Korean and, to my surprise, very comfortably and not totally incompetently.

Our love blossomed quickly, and we are now engaged. In her, I found more than my soul mate; I found myself.

All those years in Canada, I had endured my share of identity crises and uncertainty about where I belonged -- ironic, since I was surrounded by Koreans. Now, in this remote Dutch city with no more than 30 Koreans, I'm more certain about my Korean identity than I ever was.

In my first days in the Netherlands, my uncertainty followed me: I hesitantly told people that I was from Canada (to explain my fluent English), but that I was born in Korea (to explain my Asian appearance). Now, I tell people that I'm from Korea and that I lived in Canada for many years. This may seem like a trivial difference, but it represents a major transition in how I perceive the narrative of my life.

She writes e-mails to my parents and talks to them on the phone, calling them "ah-buh-neem" and "uh-muh-neem." They are understandably ecstatic. I'm sure that they never anticipated having a daughter-in-law who speaks so sweetly to them in perfect Korean. (Actually, given my apparent lack of motivation in the relationship department in recent years, they would've been satisfied if I got married at all.)

This summer, before our wedding, we plan to visit our families in Canada and Korea. My trip to Korea carries a great deal of significance. You see, it will be my first return to Korea since my departure in 1987. In addition to meeting my future in-laws, I will meet many of my own relatives for the first time in 20 years.

I keep wondering what it will feel like when I set foot on Korean soil. Will it feel like a foreign country? Will it feel strange to see so many Koreans everywhere? Or will it feel like returning home? I do know that it will be a powerful experience.

Thank you, my love, for shedding new light on my life's narrative and for agreeing to co-write the rest of it.

Justin Park is a 1.5-generation, Korean Canadian living in the Netherlands. To submit a column to C3 News and Views, contact Angela MacKenzie at aymackenzie@gmail.com.

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